How the LGBTQ+ Community Might Just Save the Church
(& Everything Else)
I am going to say something you likely do not often (maybe never) hear:
The church (synagogue, mosque, temple, etc.) needs LGBTQ+ people if it is going to survive and thrive.
Okay. Sit with that for a minute. Breathe deep.
For some those words will be shocking. For others, a salve on a deep and aching wound. For all, they are likely to be foreign and even suspect.
Let me explain.
First, some background.
I grew up with significant church abuse. I know what damage can arise from an institution that professes to speak for God and to love everyone, but whose actions demonstrate anything but love. I also know the intense pain of leaving (and being thrown out of) church and all the upheaval and devastation that involves. There is nothing quite like believing even God doesn’t love you.
Growing up the way I did, my life has often felt like walking toward the unknown up a staircase enveloped in fog that slowly dissipates the higher I trod. In recent years, the fog of my own privilege and station in life has finally begun to lift. It is funny how one can know something on an abstract, peripheral level, but it never touches the depths, the place that moves us to action.
Before this latest emergence through the mist, I was a big believer in myself as a nice person who wanted the best for others.
I see now it was that belief that kept me blind and passive with respect to oppression of all kinds for most of my life.
From thinking “I don’t see color” is a good thing to say to raising my beautiful gay stepson with love and affirmation but not a word or act of advocacy in the world, I greatly erred on the side of “staying in my own lane” for far too long.
That has changed. Drastically.
Now you know a bit about me, we can move on to the critical subject at hand — the vital importance of the affirmation and full inclusion of the LGBTQ+ community in the church and the world in general (so, yes, this article is for everyone whatever your faith may or may not be).
The idea that led to the audacious statement at the start of this article was birthed in me after I heard a similar comment made by Rachel Held Evans in her book, Seeking Sunday. She had this thought after attending a Gay Christian Network (GCN) conference where she witnessed story after story of pain, realization, and healing, and feeling for the first time in a while that she was actually “at church,” in that place.
Whether or not church/God is your thing, I think those of you in the LGBTQ+ community who are reading this can relate to feeling most alive, most seen, and/or most safe in situations where you are surrounded by others who share your life experiences. Sure, most of us feel an extra level of comfort or even prefer to be among “our own people,” but few know the intensity of rejection or even peril LGBTQ+ people can face in the world at large. We may have become more accustomed to LGBTQ+ folk and lingo in recent decades, but it is still true that venturing out from the few places your truth is allowed to exist can be scary at best, and downright dangerous at worst.
And yet, countless people from this community do just that. Amid hate and misinformation, LGBTQ+ people all over the world, themselves bruised and battered, do go out and live their lives, often doing their best to educate, uplift, and heal those around them. This isn’t everyone. However, those who are too tired, hurt, angry, or injured to carry the gauntlet of truth to the masses can rest knowing they are represented well by those who stand up in the face of the prodigious flow of opposition and ignorance. Day in and day out, they trudge this new path with gracious fervor.
It is this quality from this oppressed group of people to which the church (and world) needs to pay attention.
History is rife with pivotal points of growth that have changed the course of civilizations. I believe we are in the midst of such a pivot right now, and the affirmation and inclusion of LGBTQ+ people is one of the major keys to ensuring a positive trajectory.
The research has been done and the theology debated for years. I, personally, have spent more hours than I can count taking people systematically through a contextual exegesis of what the Bible actually says to them so they may see what they missed along the way. This can be helpful, but the truth is, it’s a secondary step at best. The lion’s portion of the work is accomplished when people’s hearts and minds open to the stories of real people.
Real people in the Christian church, such as Justin Lee, who wrote the book Torn, or Matthew Vines, author of God & the Gay Christian. Or “feet to the pavement” people everywhere, like the members of PFLAG who transform their scars into signs, standing on street corners, talking to neighbors and coworkers, giving their life stories hands, feet, and warm smiles. The tenacity, passion, and visceral reality of these living, breathing narratives is the way forward. For wherever we embrace this kind of diversity, capacious love, compassion, kindness, and growth are bound to follow.
If we can see a world where every color, every shape, every gender expression, and every way of loving is fully accepted and integrated, then what we will see is a world that most closely resembles the message of Jesus. In this tradition, the story goes that God came to earth as Jesus, wrapped in flesh to walk among us, to break bread, to listen, to touch, and to feel with us what it is to be human. After doing this, His final words to His closest friends were, “As I have loved you, so you must love one another,” (the book of John, chapter 13, verse 34; New International Version).
There is so much left unsaid here. Years of experience cannot adequately be reflected in a simple article. Take this much if you will:
What you do matters. Next time you feel down, tired, burnt out, and defeated, take a break or pass the baton to someone else. It is okay. You are doing the heavy lifting of forging a new path in the world, one that will lead to a more expansive and richer place than we have ever been before. The next-level promised land where all truly are welcomed.
Hang on. Hang tight. Keep breathing. Harvest will come.
Written by book author, blogger, & educational/motivational speaker, Hannah Smith, MA LMHC CGP. Certified Interpersonal Neurobiologist, Group Specialist & Founder of Potential Finders Network, LLC, Hannah provides cutting-edge holistic consultation, training, and a variety of innovative personal development services. Hannah’s passion is to see people reach their potential and find lasting, positive change.
This includes seeing an affirming, inclusive world without oppression where each person is appreciated for the unique gift they are. To that end, it is my promise to strive in all I do to be inclusive myself and, when possible, to speak for the freedom of others and against hate, injustice, and ignorance. I spend most of my time “calling in” with education, gentle redirection, and curiosity — but where needed, I will not hesitate to “call out,” as well. I stand with all oppressed & marginalized people and I am hopeful for a day where this is not a “social” issue but it something that every institution, business, and group of any kind will take seriously and support.
