BREAKING THE BOUNDARIES ON FAITH
How My Queer Friend Blew My Mind…for Good!
I have someone I would like you to meet, but first a bit of backstory.
At the time of this writing, Easter has not yet happened, and we are edging ever nearer the joy of PRIDE month. Being a person of faith and an aspiring ally working as an advocate and activist to the LGBTQIA+ community, I know all too well the oddness of the juxtaposition of those two events for many people. Daily, I read countless messages of people fighting for and wrestling with their faith, wondering how the same traditions that have brought comfort, peace, and purpose in their lives have also produced people who treat them so horrendously.
Religious or not, when hundreds of bills that lead to dangerous, life-altering, and dehumanizing laws are proposed and passed by government officials who say they speak for and follow God, and when some of those same people spew vitriolic hate toward genderqueer children, how can anyone not walk away feeling outrage, bewilderment, and despair?
This is where I spend my days. In the muck and the mire of it all, hoping to offer a tiny light of hope or a kind and soothing word to a bruised and beaten soul. I also do what I can to provoke thought, educate and, when possible, shout and holler about the injustice of it all.
I am not alone. Honored and humbled, my little feet occupy a tiny corner of a mighty ring of champions far greater and more knowledgeable than myself. People who send me marveling at their beauty, resilience, and mind-blowing wisdom every day.
Billie is one of these people.
BILLIE’S GIFT
I first met Billie online on Twitter almost eighteen months ago (Yeah, I’m still in rebellion and refuse to call it “X”).
I was struck first by her persistence at providing daily affirmations to her trans siblings around the globe. It did not take long before I saw how brilliant she was in at least half a dozen other arenas, including history, theology, and blog writing on a myriad of topics. She has been such a help and inspiration to me.
Flash forward to January of this year when I attended a large Queer Christian Conference held in Albuquerque. Joy of joys, I was able to meet her and a few of the other daily warriors I had only ever interacted with online. As we rushed from one seminar to another, we stole a moment in a common area to take the selfie at the top of this article. What a treat!
During the conference, Billie gave me a precious gift by introducing me to several magnificent new concepts I had not heard. One is a word/concept she and her brother coined: “Eucontamination” — which, in great brevity, is something like “infecting for good.” You will definitely want to read her article about that!
She also spoke on something called “Bounded-set versus center-set” theology — and my brain exploded.
As did my heart.
The religion I’ve been most affiliated with in my life has been the Christian tradition. I love and try to follow the teachings of Jesus, who, surprisingly to some, I believe would be open to all people everywhere, wherever they are on their journey. I also happen to believe that certain Christian belief systems are the primary underlying reason for much of what is wrong and harmful in our country, and I mean to make that known. Calling oneself Christian does not, in fact, mean one adheres to the teachings of Jesus.
Gandhi knew this. He once said, “If all Christians acted like Christ, the whole world would be Christian.”
When I returned from my trip and found time to do some polls. I found most people who responded had never heard of these concepts. My wheels began to turn, and they are still going strong!
Many of those I work with still want to have faith, but after being so tremendously harmed by the church, they are bewildered at how a people who are meant to be following someone like Jesus can be so cruel. They don’t know what to make of it all.
Thanks to Billie, I feel like I have a bit of an answer to that now. Here is how I understand and explain it.
TWO VIEWS OF GOD
Bounded-set theology in Christianity (it is also a mathematical concept) essentially says that Jesus is a singular (i.e., very small) point in the center of a circle surrounded by a great boundary. Those within the boundary “belong” and those outside do not. It is the very definition of “Us against them.” Proximity to the center within the circle might matter to some, but true interaction with or emulation of Jesus is not necessary. Just being in, however close to the edge, is enough.
Center-set theology, on the other hand, says that Jesus is a large point at “the center,” but there are no boundaries, no “in or out,” no “us and them.” Just Jesus and everyone else. It also says any movement toward love is a movement toward the center, toward Jesus. There is freedom of choice and there is allowance for all people to be exactly where they are without condemnation, fear, or worry.
A detailed discussion of how these two theories have emerged is beyond the scope of this article, though a reference to Billie’s writing on the matter is below and the reader is encouraged to continue studying, if interested. The goal of this writing is to point out the two systems, discuss a bit about how people may come to follow them, and to show how these concepts describe the behavioral outcome of the beliefs of many people.
“Behavioral outcome?” I am often asked.
Yes. The cruelty or affirmation we see in Christian circles are behavioral outcomes that can be explained by these two belief paradigms. Let’s dive in deeper.
TWO TYPES OF CHRISTIANS
Before I learned the two views of God described above, I was aware of Christians exhibiting two distinct patterns of behavior. It was as if there were two completely different types of people referring to themselves as Christian. Me being who I am, I labeled these two categories so I could more easily talk about them. They are, “Power-First” and “Love-First,” Christians.
Power-First (PF) Christians have a few identifying characteristics. They tend to center the Bible, believing it to be infallible, inerrant, immutable (unchanging over time) and authoritative on a staggering level. The Bible is taken literally for the most part. PF Christians come across as holding certainty and adherence to specific beliefs as the principle duty in all of life. They are often averse to considering any form of nuance and will reject reality if it does not fit their worldview. In other words, they have a fixed mindset when it comes to all things religious. When reading the Bible, they use a hermeneutic (interpretation key) that says power is God’s chief attribute. All aspects of life are seen through that lens and the major driver of literally all of it is fear.
Love-First (LF) Christians have an appreciation for the Bible but promote reading it in context. The Bible is seen as a book of wisdom that points to God, who is unchanging, but is written by humans who very much develop over time. These folks hold the fruits of the spirit, relationship and community, justice, equity, and the ending of oppression as the dearest tenants of their faith. They have a growth mindset and do not balk at asking difficult questions, having doubts, or needing to change course from old ideas. For them, love is the primary characteristic of God and this informs their understanding of the Bible, nature, and anything else to do with the idea of God. LF Christians are motivated by connection, growth, and the pursuit of justice rather than fear.
It is probably no shock that I consider myself a Love-First Christian and that, as a whole, we would likely adhere to a center-set theological worldview.
As for the the Power-First folk, they behave more like those who follow bounded-set theology.
In my online posts, I often refer to Power-First followers as Meanies, for short. This may seem snarky, but in my heart, it is a bit of an endearment because I know this life. I used to be a Meanie myself. I know the misery, shame, and bitterness that accompany this worldview. The allure of being “in” is not just heady, when fear is at the heart of everything, it can feel downright lifesaving.
HOW DID WE GET HERE?
You may be wondering, if being a Meanie feels so bad, then why do they stay that way? What is the draw toward an “Us against them” theology?
On the surface, simply looking at the description of the two types of Christians would have most people calling themselves “Love-First,” including many of the Power-First Believers! After all, in talking to them, they often honestly believe they are acting in love. Really honest or more educated ones will realize and (often brazenly) admit their belief that God’s power is primary. This is not as common.
A ton of psychological, sociological, and trauma-related factors are involved in dividing people between these two categories. In short, though, one of the key contributing factors to the appeal of one over the other is the absolute centrality and worship of the Bible (Bibliolatry) coupled with the cultural mandate toward certainty and power as an antidote to fear.
Combine this with the fact that very few people, including church leaders it turns out, ever actually read the scriptures at all, with even fewer reading them in context, and the picture begins to clear.
I did some research into this.
Theology is the study of nature of God and religious practice. Theologians spend many years acquiring post-graduate degrees studying various topics, such as linguistics, sociology, anthropology, history, politics, and other topics in addition to the Bible itself. The study is academically rigorous to say the least. God is complex. In some ways, the study of theology is also one of the most complex of academic endeavors one can undertake.
According to studies conducted by Harvard, though, reading this article may give you more knowledge about theology than up to eighty percent of church leaders in this country, who have no formal training in (and likely zero exposure to) theology.
Think about the ramifications of this.
Power is a lot like love. Powerful people garner attention, adoration, and influence, which can easily be confused with real connection. The problem is that power is a “near enemy” of sorts to love, but is actually antithesis to it. Therefore, to maintain this belief system, reality must be rejected, and a delusion of sorts must form. The stories we tell ourselves and the tactics used to sustain the false, but alluring, “connections” gained by power, require coercion, manipulation, and an acceptance of tools of dehumanization. These are mislabeled and taken as loving in this paradigm.
We are social creatures. This includes church leaders. When one comes to the Bible filled with fear and without an understanding of how to interact properly with it, confusing power for love is easy. After all, the words on the page alone absolutely paint a picture of a wrathful and exacting God who is also supposed to be thought of as loving. The paradox becomes untenable when the words are meant to be read as literal and perfect. Bounded-set theology provides a way to make sense of what is read. One obtains a distorted, but effective way to find “safe” ground.
Reading and studying scriptures in context does away with this issue and allows for a holistic view of Jesus and the Bible. Understandably (and sadly), that is anathema to Power-First folk.
Hence the ease with which vitriol rolls off their tongues or appears in their writing.
WHAT DO I DO NOW?
Whew! That was a lot.
If reading this has you wanting to call me names and preach at me, then you are encouraged to spend some time answering the following questions.
1. What would it mean to me if this article is true?
2. What am I afraid will happen if I consider another way of thinking?
3. What will I lose if I change my mind?
On the other hand, if all of this resonates with you, here are some ideas to keep in mind if you interact with any Power-First folks.
1. Check first for good faith. If you are being belittled, attacked, or otherwise treated poorly, then consider not engaging until the person has demonstrated the ability to show respect and consideration.
2. Ask yourself the question, “What would this person have to admit in order to agree with me right now?” This will give you perspective and direction.
3. Stay curious, not accusatory or shaming. Ask lots of questions. “What brought you to that conclusion?” “What was your journey from ‘outside’ to ‘inside’ the bounded set?” Or any of the questions above.
Working though issues related to these two world views is difficult and often leads to a deconstruction of old ideas. Give yourself time, support, patience, and compassion (toward self and others). The journey toward center, toward love, is worth it.
Thank you for reading! Check out Billie’s brilliant work on the bounded and center-set theology, Maybe We Should Talk about Center Set Churches Again. There is a wonderful twist at the end, I highly recommend it!
Written by book author, blogger, & educational/motivational speaker, Hannah Smith, MA LMHC CGP. Certified Interpersonal Neurobiologist, Group Specialist & Founder of Potential Finders Network, LLC, Hannah provides cutting-edge holistic consultation, training, and a variety of innovative personal development services. Hannah’s passion is to see people reach their potential and find lasting, positive change.
